


un aveu mentholé à la fin de l'été

by LtTanyaBoone



Category: Cardinal (TV 2017)
Genre: F/F, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-31 06:27:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19420333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LtTanyaBoone/pseuds/LtTanyaBoone
Summary: stories of Lise dating other women that I wrote for Pride month





	1. John & Lise (Lise/Danielle) standalone #1

**Author's Note:**

> John Cardinal & Lise Delorme (mention of Lise Delorme/Original Female Character). "Danielle" in this is the same Danielle Sargeant that originally shows up in ["comme des diamants au ciel"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15052739), though the first time Lise and her meet is different in this story. My interpretation of Lise Delorme is that she is a bisexual character, though that has not been confirmed (or denied) by the show and/or books. Danielle is an original character and a trans woman.
> 
>  **trigger warning** for domestic abuse (not graphic, not described, Cardinal asks a question regarding a potentially abusive situation)
> 
> the title is a line from Evelyne Brochu's ["Maintenant ou jamais"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTonFnxE-lg)

When they return to the precinct, John jerks his head towards the briefing room, meeting Lise’s gaze. She bites back a wince and swallows.

“Let me grab a drink first, okay,” she tells him and goes to find herself a glass and a bottle of water. And wonders, if she should add some aspirin. Her head is throbbing with a headache and her legs aren’t too far behind, either. She leans against the counter in their small kitchen, twisting open the bottle and downing half of it in one go before she tilts her head back and puts the cool plastic against her heated skin. It’s only nine in the morning and she’s already sweating her ass off. Summer sucks.

Lise takes the bottle to her desk and rummages around in her purse for the emergency ibuprofen she keeps in it. Takes a pill and finishes her drink, before going to throw the bottle out and grab two more, another for herself and one for John, if he wants it.

She finds him in the briefing room, standing with his hands on his hips, frowning down at the carpet. He’s closed the other door and Lise finds her brows rise in surprise, before she turns and closes the one she just came through as well.

“Want some?” she asks him, holding out one of the bottles to him. He startles from his thoughts and she sees his face soften as he reaches out and takes the bottle, drinking a couple sips of the cool liquid as she does the same from hers, before pulling her notepad from her back pocket and tossing it onto the table.

“Well, that was a waste of time,” she declares as she kicks her heel against the floor, leaning against a cabinet as she cradles her bottle, touching the plastic to the side of her neck. A shiver runs down her spine at the drop in temperature and she closes her eyes with a soft sigh of relief.

Their interview with their latest victim’s spouse hadn’t given them anything new. They definitely could have waited with that until later today. No need to get out of bed this early, especially not when she’d had such a hard time finding sleep last night, anyway.

John lets out a grunt and takes a long drink of his water as Lise watches him.

“Was there something you wanted to say?” she asks him, shifting her weight as she feels her hackles rise. He’s been, very weird, since this morning. Since he first saw her today.

“Actually, yes,” he nods, caping his bottle again before he sets it down. Crosses his arms and paces a few steps, which leaves him further away from her than before. Lise doesn’t fail to notice that there are now three chairs between them, and the edge of the table, and she has a clear shot of both doors. Nor does she fail to realize that John waits for her to take that in and relax.

“What’s going on?” she asks, her brows furrowing in slight confusion.

“I’m gonna, ask you something. A few questions. At least two. And I, I need you, to be honest with me. Alright?” John presses, his voice strangely soft. The way he gets, when he talks to children. Or traumatized victims.

“John,” she chuckles with a soft shake of her head before deciding to humor him. “Alright. Ask away,” she sighs, motioning for him to go ahead as she takes another sip of her drink.

“Are you seeing someone?”

Lise’s body jerks forward and she splutters, coughing when her attempt to not spit her water across the room makes it go down the wrong pipe. She reaches up, wiping the back of her hand across her mouth as she feels her cheeks heat in embarrassment. A bloody cop, a damn detective, and she has no poker face whatsoever.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles, stepping towards the table and grabbing a Kleenex from the box to wipe the liquid from her chin before casting a glance down at her top. Oh well, it’s only water, it will dry. And soon, in this heat.

“Lise.”

John’s voice cuts through her thoughts and she looks up to see him search her face, concern shining in his eyes. She allows a sigh to escape herself and tilts back her head.

“Yes,” she admits, a flush tingeing her cheeks. She hadn’t planned on him finding out like this. Actually, she’s been working up to telling him. That she’s, dating. Is seeing someone. Someone wonderful, someone amazing. Someone who makes her heart beat fast and butterflies take off in her stomach. Who makes her grin stupidly at her phone with every text message and laugh softly at the voice messages.

“I’m sorry,” she apologizes, her shoulders slumping. “We… I, wasn’t ready. To, tell people. Not yet,” she tells him, licking her lips. “I know it’s hard to understand-”

“I think I understand plenty,” John shakes his head and Lise recoils at the sudden anger in his voice. Her eyes dart to his hands, see them balled into tight fists as a storm rages in his eyes. She frowns in confusion, trying to puzzle out where she took a wrong turn, trying to understand what she missed.

They, kissed. Months and months ago, after they found Catherine’s killer. He’d been, not exactly sober, and just been thanking her, rambling on and on, and then his lips had been on hers.

It hadn’t been bad. Which, might have been the issue. If it had been bad, then it wouldn’t have taken them weirdly dancing around each other for two months to manage to clear the air, between them.

The thing is, she likes John Cardinal. He’s an attractive guy with a heart of gold. And in a different life, she might have actually fallen in love with him. She definitely had a crush on him. But that was before he became her friend. Before they got close. There is something in him, in his soul, a darkness, that Lise feels call to the hidden depths in her own. Perhaps an attempt at a relationship between the two of them would be great. The sex certainly would be, Lise is pretty sure about that. But she’s also sure that, in time, John and her would destroy each other. Their tendency to keep things bottled up until they reach breaking point, combined with their insecurities about themselves… It would be a recipe for a relationship annihilation. And Lise likes him way too much, to risk that.

John lets out a loud breath through his nose, his jaw working as he nods.

“Alright,” he mutters, deflating a little as he meets her gaze again. “I gotta ask you something else.”

“Okay,” Lise nods. “We can talk about this, after, if you want to,” she offers. “It’s not that I didn’t trust you. I do. It just…”

“I know,” John nods, making her blink in surprise at the moisture in his eyes. “It’s not your fault, Lise.”

“Not my- what?” she asks, leaning back in confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“He’s hitting you, isn’t he?”

She blinks at him once, twice, her brain needing a moment to process his words and their meaning. And Lise can’t help herself, once it does, once she realizes what John said, she breaks out into hysterical laughter.

“I’m sorry,” she mutters, leaning forward to brace herself on the back of a chair with one hand, the other pressing over her mouth to stifle a giggle. When she looks up again after drawing a deep breath, she finds John there, arms crossed tightly over his chest as he stands and glares at her.

“I’m sorry,” she repeats, reaching up to wipe at the tears in the corners of her eyes. “I just- Really?” she asks, a chuckle escaping her again.

“Right,” John huffs with a shake of his head. Looks away, through the window into the office space where McLeod is munching on a donut, his feet up on Lise’s chair. She frowns at the sight, making a mental note to make the man exchange chairs with her when she returns.

“Look,” she starts, softening as she takes a step towards him. “I, appreciate, the concern. I do. But I am fine. No one, is hitting me,” she assures him, meeting his eyes.

“Wanna tell me how you got that, then?” he inquires sharply, pointing at her cheek. Lise reaches up, fingers tracing her left cheekbone, gently touching the skin and pressing down. There is no bruise. She would know if there were. She’s not, not lying. No one is hitting her, she didn’t walk into anything, no suspect took a swing at her…

“Here,” John frowns and pulls out his phone. Turns on the camera and snaps a picture of Lise’s face before she can react, and then turns it around for her to see.

Sure enough, there is a faint blue line, along her cheekbone. She frowns at it, touching the spot on her face in confusion, before she closes her eyes as realization dawns on her.

The detective lets out a soft curse and hands John his phone back, taking out her own.

“It’s not a bruise,” she tells him as she opens up the camera roll, scrolling through the countless images she took the past two days.

“Lise,” he sighs, sounding defeated. “You barely manage to take one step without wincing. At least you couldn’t earlier. I’m guessing you took something and it’s finally kicking in, because you’re doing fine now. But if someone is hurting you-”

“Here,” she interrupts him and turns her phone to show him a picture from the day before. She zoomed in on it, so that he wouldn’t see the other person in the shot. Would only be able to see her, Lise. Who has a blue-purple-pink flag painted on her left cheek.

“It was Pride in Toronto,” she tells him as he stares at the image. “It was hot, I sweat a lot in the heat… I guess the blue dye left a stain,” she shrugs. It’s not that prominent, really. Is actually pretty faint, she’s surprised he noticed. She certainly didn’t when she got ready this morning. But then again, there’s no natural sunlight in the bathroom she got ready at, and she was still pretty tired when she did, so she might have missed it.

“You went to Pride?” he frowns, finger moving over the image, and she quickly pulls her phone back, before he can see who else is in the picture. “Isn’t that for…”

Lise tilts her head as he trails of. Watches John’s brows dip in confusion, before his eyes widen and she lets out a soft chuckle, scrolling through her pictures, looking for one she knows she took of a flag display.

“There,” she murmurs and shows him the flag with the same colors as the ones she had on her cheek the day before. The one that has _BISEXUALITY_ written across it in beautiful silver hand lettering.

“Wow,” John mutters, pulling out a chair and sinking down into it. Lise gives him a moment before she sits down as well. Puts her phone down and leans forward to touch her hand to his knee.

“Hey,” she breathes, trying to catch his attention. “I’m, sorry. For laughing, earlier,” she apologizes to him. “I appreciate the concern. Really. It just… It, blindsided me. That you thought it, suspected that someone would… I know that part of that probably was because I kept this, this relationship secret. But I promise you, I’m not getting hurt. Neither physically, nor emotionally.”

“Okay,” John nods, swallowing thickly. His brows furrow again as he leans back, still digesting this new revelation, about his partner.

It’s not like she actively tries to hide that fact, about herself. She just doesn’t go around telling people about it, either, unless it somehow comes up. Which it rarely does. The only time she can think of, where she hinted at her sexuality, had been in a remark designed to shut up McLeod when he’d called into question Dyson’s motives for picking Lise over the man for an NIS recommendation. She can definitely see how John had not taken that one seriously.

Lise tilts her head at him, wondering what she’s supposed to say. To tell him. Maybe the truth would be a, a good start.

“Actually, that thing I said, we could talk about? After you’d asked your questions?”

“Huh? Yeah,” he nods, picking up his water again to take a sip while Lise draws a deep breath and tries to gather her courage.

“So, part of the reason why I haven’t mentioned seeing someone was that, I wanted to make sure it was, something worth mentioning. That it wasn’t just a, quick fling,” she explains, ducking her head as she rubs her hands together, searching for the words.

“I wasn’t looking for, anything. Not a, quick shag, or a relationship, when we met, and they weren’t either. So we agreed to keep it to ourselves and to take it slow and just, see where it would lead. We’ve been together for, five months now.”

“Five months?” Cardinal repeats, voice laced with surprise. Lise nods, taking a sip of her own drink before putting the cap back on. Runs the nail of her thumb over the tiny grooves in the lid.

“Yes, five months,” she confirms with a soft smile. “It’s been, really good. Amazing, honestly. I didn’t think I’d be as happy again. Actually, I’m not sure I ever was, before, in any relationship. I feel, seen. It’s, it’s hard to describe,” she shakes her head, blinking quickly at the moisture in her eyes.

“No,” John shakes his head. “No, I, I think I understand,” he tells her. “Catherine, she had this way of, looking right through me, you know? On her good days, I sometimes thought she knew me better than I know myself,” he shrugs as Lise’s lips tug into a small smile.

“Yeah, kind of like that,” she confirms, before drawing another breath. “But, uh, there’s, a different reason,” she admits, swallowing heavily. “When you asked me, if I was getting abused… you, used the wrong pronoun.”

“Wrong pro-” he starts to repeat before cutting himself off, John’s eyes widening. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Lise nods, blushing. “Her name is Danielle. And she is, the most amazing woman I have ever met in my entire life.”

She watches her partner swallow and look down at his hands on his knees. Sees his fingers flex, before he gives a curt nod.

“Okay,” he says. “Da-, Danielle?” he repeats, using the English pronunciation of the name.

“Danielle,” Lise corrects him gently with the French one. “Her parents are French, like mine. She grew up in Montreal, but her grandparents are from Sudbury. She used to come here in the winters, as a child. We ran into each other in a coffee shop, we ordered the same thing…”

“Sounds…”

“Like a bad romance movie plot?” she supplies with a dry chuckle. “It was. We joked about it, actually. She actually made the first move when she saw me there the second time. Invited me to sit down and have my coffee with her. It was… it was, really, really nice, John,” she tells him, smiling softly at the memory.

“I believe you,” he nods, motioning towards her face. “You just lit up, talking about it.”

“Oh,” she whispers, touching her cheek and feeling herself blush in embarrassment. She has it bad. Really, really bad. She knew it before the weekend, but going to Pride with Danielle, that only drove home how in love with her Lise is. How much she’s fallen for this amazing woman with that brilliant smile and wonderful kisses.

John meets her eyes, his own curving into the hint of a smile. He nods again before standing and grabbing it bottle of water. Moves to leave the room, but then pauses at the door.

“You know, when the two of you are ready…”

“I’m sure it’ll be soon,” she tells him as she gets up herself. Pushes the chair beneath the desk and gets her notepad and water, following him. “Though, fair warning. Her cooking isn’t the best, so we may end up having to order takeout. Or eat out.”

“Huh,” John mutters with a tilt of his head. “You really must be in love. I mean, you went from, home cooked lunch in tupperware boxes, to ordering takeout?”

Lise blinks at him, thrown by the reference to her ex-husband, before she lets out a laugh and shakes her head.

“What can I say?” she shrugs, pushing past him. “She has other amazing qualities that more than make up for the lack of cooking talent.”

“I believe it,” John declares as they step into the open space of their desks and Lise sets her water down near her monitor before pulling out her chair and wheeling it over to McLeod. Who frowns at her in confusion.

She leans to the side, pointedly glaring at his shoes, before straightening again and drumming her fingers on the back of her chair in an impatient gesture. The man opens his mouth, as if to protest, before he thinks better of it. Deflates and then stands, pulling his suit jacket off the back.

“Thank you,” Lise smiles at him as he exchanges his chair for hers. “And do not do it again.”

“How did you even know?” he calls after her as she returns to her desk and sits down, lowering the seat a little so her feet can rest comfortably on the floor.

“She’s just that good,” Cardinal tells him when McLeod gives him a confused look and then sits down opposite Lise to start writing up the report of their interview earlier while Lise grins to herself.


	2. Lise Delorme/Original Female Character standalone #2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lise Delorme x Danielle Sargeant, the OC from [comme des diamants au ciel](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15052739)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **content/trigger warning** for alcohol consumption

An arm is thrown over her shoulder and Lise tenses for a moment, before Danielle pushes up against her side and then presses a loud kiss to her cheek.

“Thank you,” Lise chuckles, reaching up to take Danielle’s hand resting on her collarbone. Intertwines their fingers and tilts her head to catch her wife’s lips in a soft kiss.

“I have a confession to make,” Danielle murmurs, a sigh escaping the blonde as she rests her forehead against Lise’s temple.

“And what would that be?” Lise asks her. “That you’re way past tipsy?”

Danielle lets out a soft chuckle.

“Ooops.”

Lise leans back a little, to see her face. To be able to look into her eyes.

Oh yes, her wife is well on her way to hammered.

“Should you be drinking?” she asks her, her brows dipping into a concerned frown. She knows that the medication she’s on, for her depression and anxiety, they come with clear “no drinking” warnings. Danielle has ignored them in the past, to have the odd glass of wine, or champagne, usually hours after she took her meds. She’s never gotten drunk, though, and it, it worries Lise, if she’s being honest. That there may be something Danielle is not telling her, something she wants to, forget. Shut out of her mind.

“Maybe not as much,” the blonde admits with a shrug, lips tugging into a sheepish smile. “I didn’t realize how much was in that punch.”

“Ah,” Lise nods, understanding dawning on her. She’s the designated driver for the day. Only had half a beer at the parade earlier, and nothing else since them. But Jean’s wife made drinks for them for dinner, and Lise had already used the “I’m driving” excuse, and since Danielle was clearly buzzed, they assumed she’d be drinking, and the blonde hadn’t wanted to say no and hurt their feelings.

It’s, strange. To see Danielle and her brother attempt to navigate their relationship now. Lise will hand it to him, she hadn’t heard him use the wrong name, and he only slipped up once, when talking about something they did as children in front of Sylvain.

His wife, though? She’s an absolute angel. Lise is a fan, a huge one. And she strongly suspects that she’s the reason why Jean wanted to try reconnecting with his sister in the first place. That she pushed for it. Lise thinks it might have been a condition, in regards to their family planning. That he’d at least try to fix his relationship with his sister, before she agrees to having children with him.

It’s a nice coincidence, though, that they live in a suburb of Toronto. It meant that Danielle and her didn’t need a sitter, for the day, and could leave Sylvain with his uncle and aunt while they went to Pride. Maybe next year they can take him along, Lise muses. He’s still little, three years had seemed like too young to take him. Danielle’d feared he’d get overwhelmed and not enjoy it, and Lise had agreed with her. Next year, then.

“You smell really nice,” Danielle sighs as she presses her nose against Lise’s neck, inhaling deeply. It makes the detective let out a laugh and shake her head.

“I smell like sunscreen and sweat,” she tosses back, gently pushing Danielle’s head up. “Hey,” she murmurs, meeting her eyes.

“Hey,” her wife replies, leaning in for a soft kiss. And another. And another, one that’s followed by her slipping her free hand under Lise’s tank top.

“Non,” she shakes her head, letting go of Danielle’s hand to remove the one under her clothing.

“Lise,” her wife whines with a pout, trying to catch her lips again in a hungry kiss.

“We’re at your brother’s place,” she reminds her softly. “I am not making out with you on their back porch. And we are not having sex in the guest bedroom.”

“Even if they are having sex in theirs?”

“Danielle,” she shakes her head in exasperation, unable to prevent herself from smiling at the pouty expression on the blonde’s face. God, she loves her. Loves her so much, she’d do anything for her. Walk to the ends of the Earth, if she had to. For Danielle, and for their precious little son, too.

“Je t’aime,” she whispers, touching her hand to the blonde’s cheek. “You really are, the love of my life.”

Danielle beams at her, a blush coloring her cheeks as she leans in for another quick kiss.

“I love you, too,” she mumbles, lips brushing against Lise’s as she speaks. “You’re the most amazing thing on this planet. Possibly the entire universe. Wait, non,” she says, shaking her head as she leans back. “I forgot Sylvain. He’s the most amazingest.”

“Amazingest?” Lise repeats with a low chuckle as her wife gives a shrug.

“You’re most amazing, he’s most amazingest,” she declares.

“Ah,” Lise nods, her lips curving into a soft smile. “Makes sense.”

“Don’t mock me,” her wife pouts, narrowing her eyes slightly at her before she reaches up to brush a loose strand of hair behind Lise’s ear. That look in her eyes, the one of utter adoration, it makes Lise blush furiously. She won’t ever get used to that, she doesn’t think. Of someone looking at her like, like this. Like she’s the source of light and happiness and warmth for them. The center of the universe, the best thing they’ve ever laid eyes on.

Not that she looks at Danielle any differently. There are countless of pictures, of her just staring at her wife and turning into a personification of the heart-eyes emoji. It’s ridiculous, in anyone else Lise would find it nauseating, this dopey look of utter adoration she often wears, but she just can’t help herself. Doesn’t want to help herself, either. She loves Danielle, loves her so much, and she wants everyone to know how amazing and wonderful her wife is. Even when she’s pretty drunk.

“Come on,” she whispers, touching her forehead to Danielle’s and brushing her curls back from her face. “Let’s get you into bed, so you can sleep this off.”

“Only if you join me,” her wife insists, perking up when the back door opens again, Laure stepping out.

“There you are,” Danielle’s sister-in-law smiles at them, tilting her head a little. “I was about to lock up, but if you want to stay outside for a bit-”

“No, thank you,” Lise shakes her head, wrapping an arm around Danielle’s waist, to steady her a little. “We’re gonna head off to bed, I think. Do you have anything planned, for tomorrow?” she asks the other woman, wanting to know if there’s a schedule they’ll need to be aware of and keep to. 

“No,” Laure shakes her head easily, chuckling when Danielle noses at the underside of Lise’s jaw. “I like to sleep in, so Jean usually makes breakfast after his run.”

“You like running,” Danielle reminds Lise, who shakes her head. She’s not going for a run the morning after Pride, no matter how much she might like the activity itself, or wants to spend some time with Danielle’s brother, to get to know him a bit better.

“Well, yes, I do,” Lise says when she sees Laure’s confused expression. “But not after I spent the previous day on my feet the whole time. Not happening, thank you,” she declares, drawing a chuckle from her sister-in-law.

“There should be something for sore muscles in the in the bathroom cabinet. It’s a salve, in case you need it,” she tells them as Lise ushers Danielle inside.

“Thanks, I might actually do,” she admits, feeling the protest of her leg muscles when she lifts them to get over the threshold inside the house. She’s definitely not getting any younger, she thinks. And they’ll have an energetic toddler to deal with tomorrow, as well. One who won’t understand why neither Danielle, nor her are up to any chasing around or energetic games. But maybe Jean will be, or Laure. If they want to play with Sylvain, that is.

Though that’s something she’ll tackle tomorrow. The whole thing, of figuring out what they might do for the day, to keep the little guy entertained. She’s kind of too tired to do it, right now, and there is the fact that she still has to get up the stairs, and somehow manage to get her pretty drunk wife into bed. Lise thinks bribery might be required, but then again, Danielle herself looks pretty done for the day, too.

“Alright,” Laure nods, closing the back door and locking it. “The front door is armed, you guys still have the code?”

“Yeah,” Danielle nods, repeating it. It’s the wedding anniversary of Laure’s parents, actually. They hadn’t wanted to use their own, fearing that someone might know it and use it to gain access to the house.

“You should get one for the back door, as well,” Lise remarks, still not entirely sure who got a house alarm but only for their front door. Especially if the back door was much more easier to get into, and out of sight from noisy neighbors.

“I know,” Laure nods with a sigh. “I keep telling him, but he’s just…” she trails off with a frown. “Maybe you could, throw some statistics at him. You’re a cop, he might listen to you more in regards to this. I think he has this, idea, that I’m just scared of an invasion while I’m home,” she rolls her eyes.

“I’ll talk to him,” Lise promises, reaching out to squeeze Laure’s arm, the other woman smiling at her.

“Alright, thanks,” she nods before letting out a soft giggle. “Maybe you should, get that one into bed,” she adds with a nod towards Danielle. Who’s leaning against the arm of the couch, her eyes starting to close.

“I better,” Lise chuckles and gently takes her wife’s hands, leaning in for a quick kiss. “Come on,” she murmurs against Danielle’s lips. “Let’s get you upstairs and into bed.”

“Hm,” her wife sighs softly, tracing her tongue over the detective’s lips. “Wanna celebrate more, with you. Alone. Naked,” she mumbles, and Lise is thankful that Laure is already halfway up the stairs and has probably not heard that comment.

“Maybe,” she allows, part of her wanting to be with Danielle, to make love to her wife in celebration of Pride. She brushes her lips over Danielle’s cheek, gently tugging on her hands to pull her along. “Shower first,” she murmurs, nosing at her wife’s jaw. “And if you’re still half-awake after, I’m sure we can, figure something out.”

“Hm, sounds good,” Danielle agrees, following her up the stairs with sudden eagerness that makes Lise bite back a giggle.


	3. Lise Delorme/Noelle Dyson standalone #3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **content/trigger warnings** for injuries
> 
> maybe a kind of continuation of my ['a walk to the summit at night'](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1266344) series? definitely takes place well after season 3

The girl hates her. Delorme draws a deep breath, wincing when the expansion of her ribcage reminds her painfully of her bruised ribs.

She’s pretty sure that, for Jane, she looks just fine. She took her ponytail down and shook out her hair, so it covers the steristrips keeping together the cut along her left temple. Took a hefty dose of painkillers, too, so she could manage with her arm out of the sling. It’s not broken. Her collarbone is just, battered. Has a hairline fracture. They gave her the sling to take the strain off her shoulder and collarbone, but she doesn’t want to frighten the child. Figured that the sight of the large bandage along her jaw and neck might already do that. But the abrasions haven’t bled through yet, the material of the thing is still pristine white, and so Jane is free to, hate her guts, without worrying about Delorme’s health.

It hadn’t been her idea, this undercover stint. But Noelle told her that she’d had a request, and while she would have helped Lise avoid the thing, it had also been obvious that it would help her career. So she’d, taken it. She’d thought, a week, two tops. But then they’d come across evidence of this being a lot more than the small fry drug seller that they’d expected, and two weeks turned into six, and then nine, and then seventeen.

Seventeen bloody weeks in Boomfuck Nowhere, Ontario. Seventeen weeks without a chance to talk to Noellle, or Jane, for that matter.

“I’m sorry,” Noelle murmurs after Jane stomps from the room, the door to the child’s room slamming loudly behind her little body. “I, I tried to explain it to her, but…” she trails off with a sigh. Reaches up to rub her hands over her face and Lise swallows thickly. Forces a smile.

“It’s fine,” she tells her. Meets Noelle’s eyes, for a moment, before she looks down the hallway, not entirely sure what she’s supposed to do. Her entire body hurts. She wants a warm bath and a stiff drink, scratch that, she wants a whole bottle, and then to curl up next to Noelle.

God, she missed her. She missed her so much. There wasn’t a single night where Lise didn’t wish she was back home, back in Noelle’s bed, with the woman’s arm draped over her waist, her soft breathing filling the night air of the bedroom. Not a day went by, where she didn’t wish that she could be back in her arms. That she could hold her again, and kiss her, and just, share the same space. Hell, she would have given an arm and a leg for a simple phone call after the first week.

“She’s just upset, because she doesn’t understand,” Noelle shakes her head. Draws a deep breath as she reaches out to take Lise’s hand. Intertwines their fingers and gives a soft squeeze.

“I never had to go dark like that. It doesn’t make sense to her, why you’d stop coming around, unless…”

“Unless we broke up,” Lise finishes for her, biting back a grimace.

“I’m sorry,” Noelle apologizes, stepping closer. “My sister never dated, after having her. Not that Jane knew, at least, not in a way that affected her. The only thing she ever experienced that would come close was when Sylvie and I split. I know it’s not fair, on you, this wasn’t your choice-”

“It’s okay,” Lise shakes her head, drawing a sharp breath as she reaches up to touch her right hand to her collarbone, the motion having caused pain to shoot through the side of her neck and down into her shoulder.

Perhaps she should not have come here tonight. But after being released from the hospital and the almost ten hours straight of debriefing, she’d wanted nothing more than to finally be able to see Noelle again. To be able to see her face and hear her voice and touch her… She kind of forgot, about Jane. Forgot to consider how the child might react, to seeing her again.

“Don’t you have a sling?” Noelle asks, frowning at her as she takes a step closer, almost touching her. Lise lets out a sigh and inclines her head.

“It’s in the car,” she admits. “I, took it off because it annoyed me. And I, didn’t want to scare your niece, showing up all, battered and bruised,” she shrugs before cursing loudly and cradling her arm to her chest. Noelle shakes her head at her, gently directing her to the couch.

“Sit down,” she murmurs, stroking Lise’s cheek before she ducks from the living room. Lise leans back against the back of the couch and closes her eyes as she hears the front door open and close. Noelle’s probably going to pick up the sling from the car. Probably will grab her bag, as well, so Lise has a change of clothes. Good luck with that, she thinks bitterly.

As much as she might want to, she won’t be staying the night. It’s out of the question, given Jane’s reaction to her presence. The girl had glared at her so hard, Lise would fear she was going to smother her in her sleep.

She hears Jane’s door open again and bites back a groan. If she stays quiet, maybe the girl won’t find her. And if she does, perhaps she’ll think Lise fell asleep on the couch and leave her alone.

Her ears pick up the steps coming down the hallway before they stop abruptly. Lise draws a deep breath and opens her eyes, lifting her head to see Jane in the doorway, her eyes wide.

“Where’s Aunt Noelle?” she asks, brows dipping in confusion.

“She’s getting, something, from my car,” Lise answers, pushing herself upright and hissing as pain shoots through her clavicle. She leans forward, curling in on herself, her fingers digging into the seat of the couch as she tries not to scream out in pain, or let loose the string of curses that has well up. 

Jane takes a few steps towards her before pausing and looking over her shoulder.

“Are you hurt?”

It makes her let out a bitter chuckle, the way her shoulders move causing another groan to escape Lise. Yes, she’s hurt. She’s battered and bruised and her entire body aches from the beating she received earlier, after her cover got blown. She’s in pain and tired and just wants to curl up and have Noelle hold her while she cries until the painkiller knock her out for the night.

“Yes,” she tells her, grinding out the word between her teeth as she straightens again. Looks over to see Jane shift uneasily, worry etched onto her features. Lise swallows thickly. Reaches up with her good arm and runs her hand though her hair, pushing it back from her shoulders with the motion. It exposes the bandage on the side of her neck and she sees Jane’s eyes dart to it, her lip starting to quiver.

“Are you sick?”

“What?” Lise breathes as Noelle returns, holding Lise’s sling in one hand. She pauses at the sight of her niece standing there, dark eyes darting to Lise on the couch.

“Hey,” she murmurs, touching Jane’s back. “Are you okay?” she asks her, crouching down next to her when she sees the strange expression on the girl’s face.

“Is Li- Detective Delorme,” the girl corrects herself, the change of address sending a stab of pain through Lise. It took her almost a month, before Jane used her first name, when Noelle and her started, seeing each other. Part of that might have been because Noelle professionally still calls her by her last name and rank, but outside of work, they have long ago left their last names behind, with each other.

“Is she sick?” she asks, searching her aunt’s face with terrified eyes.

“What?” Noelle breathes, sinking to her knees in surprise.

“Is that why she’s not coming over?” Jane presses, looking at Lise. She swallows thickly before rising and walking over, picking up the sling so she can put her arm back into it, get some much needed relief from that stabbing pain before she tries to puzzle that out.

“No,” Noelle shakes her head vehemently. “No, Lise isn’t sick. Are you?” she asks, looking up at her as she finishes adjusting the strap with some difficulty.

“Non,” she confirms. “I’m not sick. Injured, yes,” she allows at Jane’s skeptic expression, “but not sick.”

“Where’s this coming from?” Noelle asks, brushing her niece’s hair back from her face in a tender gesture. “Huh? Why do you think-” she begins before cutting herself off with a ragged breath.

Lise swallows thickly, looking away. She’s never… they never talked, about Jane’s mother. Not in front of the child, at least. She knows Noelle and her sister, they tried to protect her as much as they could, from the reality of radiation therapy and chemo and all the medical stuff. She knows that there was a period where Jane was ‘on vacation’ with Noelle, while Sarah went through the worst part of chemo. To prevent her from worrying too much and getting scared. Back then, they’d thought, thought that the treatment would help, that it would take care of the cancer. That it would save Sarah’s life. They’d been wrong.

She hadn’t considered that her sudden disappearance and radio silence, that it might make the girl worry that the same thing was happening to her. Hadn’t thought that Jane would jump to the conclusion that Lise was sick, too.

“Mommy had one like that,” the girl murmurs, motioning to her neck. It makes Lise frown in confusion, looking to Noelle for help.

“Oh,” the older woman breathes. “Her, her mom, Sarah… they had to access her veins though her neck, near the, the end.”

“Oh,” Lise murmurs. Draws her bottom lip between her teeth before deciding to say screw this. Reaches up and grabs the edge of the bandage, peeling it back with a hiss of pain.

“What are you-”

“See,” Lise says, kneeling down in front of Jane, “no access site, no line, no port,” she tells her with a soft smile. “I, got hit, with a piece of wood. Hence the,” she says, pointing to the side of her neck.

Jane’s eyes widen as she takes in the scrapes and bruises.

“Why did you get hit?” she asks, reaching up, fingers twitching. Noelle quickly catches her hand to prevent her from touching the cuts. The last thing Lise needs, is an infection.

“Because I was too slow,” Lise chuckles, before sobering. “I, am a police officer, yes?”

The girl nods mutely, eyes flickering briefly to her aunt, before she focuses on Lise again.

“Sometimes, when I do my work, people get, angry. Some get really really angry, and they try to hit me. I’m usually much faster than this, so they don’t manage.”

“But you were slow today?”

“Hm,” Lise sighs, slumping a little. There’s so much she cannot go into, right now. Especially because it would be inappropriate, to tell a child. How her cover got blown by a stupid mistake, how she didn’t realize it at the time. How the guy she’d been trying to gain the trust of completely took her by surprise with his assault. How she’s lucky she wasn’t just wearing a wire, but that today was one of the days with active surveillance, actually, and it only took the Mounties three minutes to come to her help.

If they hadn’t, Lise is pretty sure that today, it might have been it.

“Why?”

She draws a slow breath, her eyes darting to Noelle.

“My mind was, elsewhere,” she admits. Swallows thickly. “I was thinking about what I would do, when I was, done. When my job was finished and I could come back. What it would be like,” she tells the girl with a soft shake of her head. Searches Jane’s face before closing her eyes for a moment.

“I, owe you an apology, I think,” she tells the girl and hears Noelle inhale sharply.

“Lise-”

“Non, it’s okay,” she shakes her head at the other woman before turning her attention back to Jane. “I shouldn’t have left the way I did, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I didn’t try to at least write to you. I wasn’t allowed to call, but if I had wanted to, I could have gotten a message to you, and I didn’t even think of doing that, and that’s on me. I made a mistake and I am very, very sorry. For upsetting you, hurting your feelings-”

The girl suddenly throws herself forward, arms wrapping around Lise’s neck in a bear hug. She winces, biting back a pained whimper before she reaches up with her good arm to hug her and steady Jane, dumbfounded by the girl’s reaction as she starts to cry in her arms.

“Oh sweetie,” Noelle murmurs, reaching out to rub her niece’s back as she sobs loudly.

“I’m sorry,” Lise mutters, feeling like an absolute asshole and utterly out of her element. “I really frightened you, huh?”

Jane nods mutely and Lise pulls her a little closer. Hugs her tightly and closes her own eyes, for a moment.

“It’s okay,” she whispers, hoping to reassure the little girl. She’s been through so much, the fear she must have felt- The detective shakes her head. “I’m okay. I will be okay. It’s alright, it’s all going to be okay.”

Noelle moves close to them and wraps an arm around her niece, gently shushing her as well while leaning in to kiss Lise’s cheek. It’ll take some time, for the damage of this to start healing. But Lise can’t help but feel relieved that she’s home, and as it turns out, that Jane doesn’t actually hate her. She’s back now, and they can, can work on their relationship. And she’s really looking forward to that.


End file.
